When we ponder the challenges of language changes over time (and I couldn’t walk past the daily prompt that wants us to think of language in 2100), we think of Facebook posts that send responsible adults facepalming for hours on end. All those “lv u 4eva” and missing commas that make grammar nazi pray for a global web outage lasting the next ten years, or a baseball bat and immunity from prosecution. The latter is much preferred, though.
It’s not just English that suffers the transformation from Sigourney Weaver to an Alien child-bearer. Russian, for instance, is getting just as beaten into a pulp that soon won’t be able to carry a meaning more complicated than required to set a date (@kk, c u at shelbys).
I don’t want to believe that this Alien English (or Alien Russian/French/Italian) is the ultimate future. Creative teens who practice it will grow up and realise “creative teens” was just an euphemism for “cretins”.
Even If I have doubts about the above maturation, I am sure the language of art will keep the language alive and kicking, though which directions it is going to kick at remains a riddle wrapped in mystery.
We can only peek behind that shroud of enigma at the art-related language of the future assuming it will incorporate the most prominent concepts and ideas of today into its words and expressions.
1) to make a simple idea so overcomplicated, ten critics are needed to unravel it. A linguistic hommage (pardon my French) to Damien Hirst.
Example: John, you need to uphirst the title to something like ‘The Impossibility of Rain in the Mind of Someone Enjoying Sunshine’ to sell this landscape to a discerning customer. Paint a dark cloud somewhere at the horizon level to better drive the point.’
2) to borrow an idea of another artist, sell it at a high price, than pay a compensation in an out-of-court settlement. See Wiki for details.
Example: ‘I’ve uphirsted Mr.X to settle with him later for a half of my selling price’
Quinnesential: spectacularly presenting quintessentially a banal thought. A hommage to Marc Quinn, who could sell the idea that the Earth is rotating as a revelation. In the early 21st century. Amazing.
Example: Art ctitic, ‘This white blank of space presented as a work of art makes one think of the transience of one’s attempts to create a work of art.’ Art lover, ‘What a quinnesential drivel!’
This is what people cry out when they see seemingly random noise in an artwork which art critics believe still can make sense, if properly deciphered into their incomprehensible lingo.
In the previous example, the exclamation could be, ‘What a quinnesential pollocks!’
“such”, but blown out from proportion to be sold to new rich. A hommage to Charles Saatchi. Also refers to the art of selling ordinary stuff at inordinate prices.
Example: ‘Oh, this is saach a revolutionary work in sculpture the Abramoviches would buy it.’
Derived from “hilarious” and referring to something Larry Gagosian would love to sell to Ronald Perelman as a gesture of revenge; something that makes the buyer of an artwork an idiot the moment he decides to sell it.
Example: ‘Oh, Mike, that was a hillarryous sale. The buyer is in for a surprise!’
An art movement that wants to bring art back to reality, to the joys and pains of the real world. I am sure it would surface up on the art scene sooner or later though not so sure it would prosper.
See you soon over a Russian artist who is good, but not great, and still worth a look.